This week has been a whirlwind of preparations, from wiring money to Europe to packing to trying to get things at work squared away to minimize what my boss is going to need to cover for me and dealing with a staff member who has resigned and having two vacancies to fill... I am exhausted. But it's done now. The only thing left is some house cleaning. We're getting up super early tomorrow morning in the attempt to start preparing our bodies for the dramatic time change, so we'll do more cleaning before our ride comes to take us to the airport.
Then it's off to Rome, then Athens. Our embryo transfer is scheduled -- get this -- TWO HOURS after stepping off the plane. Yeah. And I did get the profile for our egg donor... Much less info for her than for the sperm donor, but I know she's 26, with fair skin, light brown hair, and blue-green eyes. She's 5'7" and apparently has a clean health history. This is her first egg donation, though she has had one successful pregnancy of her own. Combine that with our red headed Danish sperm donor.... And we see what we get.
We also find out if we got any good embryos, or have enough to freeze, and have to decide then how many to put in.
Then we wait, and wander around Athens, and take some tours and other neat stuff, and keep every possible appendage crossed that we get a positive pregnancy test...
Friday, December 5, 2014
Tuesday, December 2, 2014
IVF#1 CD8 International Money, AHH!
So the last few days have been a very interesting exercise in learning how international money exchanges are done....
The travel agency finally got back to me with a figure - 1440 Euro for several tours and nine nights' accommodation as well as airport transfers. Of course, because it's so late in the game I had to pay them via credit card, and of course, they don't accept my American Express that would have kept me from having to pay any currency conversion fees. I scoured the internet to try and figure out how much it would *really* cost in USD after charging it. According to the Wells Fargo site, my fee is 3% of the transaction; and according to the Visa calculator site, the total conversion rate including the 3% comes out to 1.288 USD per Euro, or about $1854. But I won't really know what exactly was charged to my card until the charge goes through, which could take a couple of days.
Add to that the roundabout necessity of wiring money to my Greek clinic's Swiss bank... the clinic sent me their bank info, and I signed up for an account on USFOREX.com (which was actually pretty easy). Then USFOREX had to call me to set my account up... then I had to create the transaction online for the 5500 Euros, and got a rate of 1.26 USD per Euro (not too bad, better than my bank which would have been at least 3% plus $45 wiring fee) for a grand total of $6913.89. Then USFOREX called me again to confirm, and they've sent me instructions to wire my money to their US bank (still going to be about a $30 wiring fee, I think). I have to go to the bank on my lunch break and complete the wire, but they assure me that as long as I wire them the money today, the Greek clinic should have the funds by Thursday or Friday.
All of this adds up SO DAMN FAST. And, if we have enough embryos for freezing, I'll owe the clinic another 1000 Euro for that and will have to go through the whole wiring process again. Except I don't know that I will be able to do that until I'm back stateside. I might have to use my Traveler Visa at an ATM ($5 plus 3% for the transaction) and pay them in cash for the freezing.
In terms of my "Costs of TTC" page, I'm only going to include 630 Euro ($806.40) of the travel agency's total - because that's the cost of the hotel. The extra tours we want to take while we're there really aren't part of the TTC expense. But I'm waiting to update these figures until I know exactly,
in USD, how much everything is going to cost.
Add to that the absolute insanity at work as I try to get ready to leave AND try to figure out how to replace my clerk (in my boss's words, "creatively") AND try to get packed at home AND try to help Kaitlin get ready to leave (she's starting to feel the pressure too) and it's just crazy. I'm so afraid I'm going to miss something vitally important.
One thing at a time, I guess. Now to cram some work in before I run to the bank and the grocery store - I need to pick up some travel sized toothpaste and some Airborne, because a bunch of the ladies at my office are sniffly and sick and I CANNOT CANNOT get sick on this trip.
If it does turn out that we need to do a second round with our frozen ones, I will have them put back two embryos for sure. The cost should be a lot less, because I'll travel alone - $1300 for a plane ticket, maybe $60/night for 2 - 3 nights in a hotel, and $1000ish for the FET, so something like $2500 when it's all said and done. After spending SO much on this already, how sad is it that I'm thinking Pshhh, $2500 is NOTHING? X.x
I would give anything for this to just work the first time. For us to be able to come back from Greece, after an amazing vacation, and find that we're pregnant... and, of course, for the pregnancy to stick and be full and healthy. That's really all I want right now. That's all I want. Please, universe??
The travel agency finally got back to me with a figure - 1440 Euro for several tours and nine nights' accommodation as well as airport transfers. Of course, because it's so late in the game I had to pay them via credit card, and of course, they don't accept my American Express that would have kept me from having to pay any currency conversion fees. I scoured the internet to try and figure out how much it would *really* cost in USD after charging it. According to the Wells Fargo site, my fee is 3% of the transaction; and according to the Visa calculator site, the total conversion rate including the 3% comes out to 1.288 USD per Euro, or about $1854. But I won't really know what exactly was charged to my card until the charge goes through, which could take a couple of days.
Add to that the roundabout necessity of wiring money to my Greek clinic's Swiss bank... the clinic sent me their bank info, and I signed up for an account on USFOREX.com (which was actually pretty easy). Then USFOREX had to call me to set my account up... then I had to create the transaction online for the 5500 Euros, and got a rate of 1.26 USD per Euro (not too bad, better than my bank which would have been at least 3% plus $45 wiring fee) for a grand total of $6913.89. Then USFOREX called me again to confirm, and they've sent me instructions to wire my money to their US bank (still going to be about a $30 wiring fee, I think). I have to go to the bank on my lunch break and complete the wire, but they assure me that as long as I wire them the money today, the Greek clinic should have the funds by Thursday or Friday.
All of this adds up SO DAMN FAST. And, if we have enough embryos for freezing, I'll owe the clinic another 1000 Euro for that and will have to go through the whole wiring process again. Except I don't know that I will be able to do that until I'm back stateside. I might have to use my Traveler Visa at an ATM ($5 plus 3% for the transaction) and pay them in cash for the freezing.
In terms of my "Costs of TTC" page, I'm only going to include 630 Euro ($806.40) of the travel agency's total - because that's the cost of the hotel. The extra tours we want to take while we're there really aren't part of the TTC expense. But I'm waiting to update these figures until I know exactly,
in USD, how much everything is going to cost.
Add to that the absolute insanity at work as I try to get ready to leave AND try to figure out how to replace my clerk (in my boss's words, "creatively") AND try to get packed at home AND try to help Kaitlin get ready to leave (she's starting to feel the pressure too) and it's just crazy. I'm so afraid I'm going to miss something vitally important.
One thing at a time, I guess. Now to cram some work in before I run to the bank and the grocery store - I need to pick up some travel sized toothpaste and some Airborne, because a bunch of the ladies at my office are sniffly and sick and I CANNOT CANNOT get sick on this trip.
If it does turn out that we need to do a second round with our frozen ones, I will have them put back two embryos for sure. The cost should be a lot less, because I'll travel alone - $1300 for a plane ticket, maybe $60/night for 2 - 3 nights in a hotel, and $1000ish for the FET, so something like $2500 when it's all said and done. After spending SO much on this already, how sad is it that I'm thinking Pshhh, $2500 is NOTHING? X.x
I would give anything for this to just work the first time. For us to be able to come back from Greece, after an amazing vacation, and find that we're pregnant... and, of course, for the pregnancy to stick and be full and healthy. That's really all I want right now. That's all I want. Please, universe??
Sunday, November 30, 2014
IVF#1 CD6 So much to do, so little time...
Thank god for the 4 day holiday weekend, as I've had to spend it making all kinds of travel plans. I did get the oil changed in my car, my hair cut and colored, groceries bought for this last week, and went to the bank for some cash in Euros (omg was that expensive, I HATE that the currency conversion rate is higher for purchasing cash than it is for credit card purchases or bank wires) and had a near panic attack in learning that the rate was going to be higher than I calculated in order to pay the clinc. But, I found a website - usforex.com - that can wire money for me to the clinic and the travel agency in Greece at an exchange rate just a tiny bit above market (1.26, above 1.24, as opposed to my bank's ridiculous 1.31) and that should save me a few hundred dollars.
But, I had to email the Greek clinic and request their bank account information so that I can wire the funds, and won't be able to complete the wire until tomorrow when the market opens. I also have to work out some travel itinerary details with the travel agency. It looks like we won't be able to take the tour we were planning on, because they only offer it starting on Mondays and the dates of our travel won't accommodate it. It may end up changing the overall price of our package, though, and that would be ok by me.
The money stuff is starting to freak me out a little. It's looking like when it's all said and done we're going to be spending just about all of that $15K I borrowed - and a lot of it is due to the currency conversion rates and the cost of spending money overseas. Maybe we'll get lucky, though, and find that we can stay within our cash for all our transportation/food/tips/shopping??
Add to all of that the anxiety over whether this extremely expensive venture is going to turn into a baby for us... whether it could turn into twins... whether it's going to be ineffective and we won't get pregnant at all and have to decide whether to spend another $4000 or so for an FET attempt...
And all of the bits and pieces at work that I'm going to have to iron out, oh my god... one of my staff just handed in her two-week notice the day before Thanksgiving, so we're going to be short one person and worried about job posting and interviews and all that, which I can't do until after I get back into the country, meaning my staff are going to be down one person for at least a month and I would guess two... and it's our most critical position, our clerk. Then there's the new software program they're trying to train staff on and roll out in January, and key training sessions are scheduled to happen while I'm going to be out... and then worst of all, the director and my boss have a meeting planned with my unit, on a day I'm not going to be there, which almost assuredly guarantees that my staff are going to throw me under the bus yet again in my absence, and I'll have to try and clean that up before a position comes open that the bosses want me to move into and leave my field of expertise for pretty much ever...
And all of this stress, of course, is not conducive to getting pregnant. I know that I should be sitting back and saying to hell with it all, what will be will be, I'm getting out of here for two weeks and taking a dream European vacation and getting pregnant to boot... and I just can't figure out how to let go of the anxiety long enough to be able to do that, because I want so much to have a crystal ball and be able to KNOW - will I get pregnant? Will things turn out okay at work? Is my absence going to result in a terrible redirection of my career? Will we be able to pay off this debt when it's all said and done? Will we end up with twins? I think, if I could see into the future and KNOW what was going to happen, all my anxiety would end. I would either make different choices to avoid a future I don't want, or at least be able to prepare myself for the consequences better because I'd know what's coming. But of course, not knowing is part of the human condition. All I can do is try to be as prepared as I can be for anything that could happen... and then accept whatever comes as something I could not have changed, because I made the very best choices I could given the information I had at the time.
So yeah. On the list of things to do today: setting up the usforex contact so I can make transfers as soon as have the amounts due; cleaning the downstairs and making a packing list; setting up the Christmas tree since we'll be hosting Christmas when we get back; making a list of things for Kaitlin to clean during her day off tomorrow. Oh, and downloading some e-books to read on the plane. If I have any time to myself, probably also writing or watching some mindless TV to take my mind off things.
Right after I finish my coffee...
But, I had to email the Greek clinic and request their bank account information so that I can wire the funds, and won't be able to complete the wire until tomorrow when the market opens. I also have to work out some travel itinerary details with the travel agency. It looks like we won't be able to take the tour we were planning on, because they only offer it starting on Mondays and the dates of our travel won't accommodate it. It may end up changing the overall price of our package, though, and that would be ok by me.
The money stuff is starting to freak me out a little. It's looking like when it's all said and done we're going to be spending just about all of that $15K I borrowed - and a lot of it is due to the currency conversion rates and the cost of spending money overseas. Maybe we'll get lucky, though, and find that we can stay within our cash for all our transportation/food/tips/shopping??
Add to all of that the anxiety over whether this extremely expensive venture is going to turn into a baby for us... whether it could turn into twins... whether it's going to be ineffective and we won't get pregnant at all and have to decide whether to spend another $4000 or so for an FET attempt...
And all of the bits and pieces at work that I'm going to have to iron out, oh my god... one of my staff just handed in her two-week notice the day before Thanksgiving, so we're going to be short one person and worried about job posting and interviews and all that, which I can't do until after I get back into the country, meaning my staff are going to be down one person for at least a month and I would guess two... and it's our most critical position, our clerk. Then there's the new software program they're trying to train staff on and roll out in January, and key training sessions are scheduled to happen while I'm going to be out... and then worst of all, the director and my boss have a meeting planned with my unit, on a day I'm not going to be there, which almost assuredly guarantees that my staff are going to throw me under the bus yet again in my absence, and I'll have to try and clean that up before a position comes open that the bosses want me to move into and leave my field of expertise for pretty much ever...
And all of this stress, of course, is not conducive to getting pregnant. I know that I should be sitting back and saying to hell with it all, what will be will be, I'm getting out of here for two weeks and taking a dream European vacation and getting pregnant to boot... and I just can't figure out how to let go of the anxiety long enough to be able to do that, because I want so much to have a crystal ball and be able to KNOW - will I get pregnant? Will things turn out okay at work? Is my absence going to result in a terrible redirection of my career? Will we be able to pay off this debt when it's all said and done? Will we end up with twins? I think, if I could see into the future and KNOW what was going to happen, all my anxiety would end. I would either make different choices to avoid a future I don't want, or at least be able to prepare myself for the consequences better because I'd know what's coming. But of course, not knowing is part of the human condition. All I can do is try to be as prepared as I can be for anything that could happen... and then accept whatever comes as something I could not have changed, because I made the very best choices I could given the information I had at the time.
So yeah. On the list of things to do today: setting up the usforex contact so I can make transfers as soon as have the amounts due; cleaning the downstairs and making a packing list; setting up the Christmas tree since we'll be hosting Christmas when we get back; making a list of things for Kaitlin to clean during her day off tomorrow. Oh, and downloading some e-books to read on the plane. If I have any time to myself, probably also writing or watching some mindless TV to take my mind off things.
Right after I finish my coffee...
Friday, November 28, 2014
IVF#1 CD4 Greece is a GO!
We have plane tickets. We're leaving this coming Saturday, the 6th, and somehow the fates arranged it so that we have one extra bonus overnight layover in Rome! So here's the itinerary as it stands for now:
Saturday, December 6th:
Leaving Denver at 10:48 AM. Arriving at JFK Airport in NYC at 4:27 PM.
Leaving NYC at 8:12 PM. Overnight flight to Rome (8 hours.)
Sunday, December 7th:
Arriving in Rome at 11:40 AM. Taking the train to downtown Rome (about 30 minutes)
Taking a walking tour around the heart of Rome to see as much as we can, including the Parthenon and the Colesseum.
Staying overnight at B&B Elevenrome.
Monday, December 8th:
Check out of the B&B by 6 AM. Walk to the train station (about 30 minutes.)
Take the 6:37 AM train to the airport (about 30 minutes) and arrive by 7:00.
Leaving Rome at 8:40 AM.
Arriving in Athens at 11:40 AM, where our tour package should provide transportation to our hotel.
We will have 6 overnights in Athens total, and 3 overnights in other places as part of the tour package. So at some point during the trip we will be taking a half-day tour of Athens, a one-day cruise between Aegina, Poros and Hydra islands, and tours of Olympia, Delphi and Meteora (with overnights in/near each.) The travel agency is choosing the hotels for this part of our trip, so I'll have to update the itinerary once we get more details about how that's going to work.
Wednesday, December 17th:
Check out of the hotel at probably 4 AM. Our tour package should provide us with transportation back to the airport.
Leaving Athens at 6 AM, arriving in Rome at 7:05 AM.
Leaving Rome at 10:30 AM, arriving in NYC (JFK) at 2:20 PM.
Leaving NYC at 8:14 PM, arriving in Denver at 10:59 PM.
And in the meantime, we'll be continuing our Lupron injections. The Greek Clinic asked me to start taking my estrogen supplements on a steadily increasing schedule, starting yesterday, so we've added that, too. I bought the tickets in my maiden name since that's the name on my passport. Hoping it won't cause an issue, but there isn't time or money to get my passport reissued in my current name.
I've started a travel documents pouch for our IDs, plane tickets, reservations, Rome and Athens maps, and anything else I can think of that we might need in paper form in case we don't have internet access. I'm also going to have to start a packing list. And, I only have a week at work to prepare for being gone for two weeks. The plan is to take two full weeks off of work, which means that I'll have a good four days (Thurs - Sunday) after we get home to recover from jet lag, put my feet up and keep on resting in the first part of the TWW.
Then it's back to work for two and a half days, a half day for Christmas Eve and a full day for Christmas off of work again, another day of work that Friday, and a weekend. We should know by New Year's or so if we are pregnant.
Oh my gosh, this is really happening. The clinic promised to send me the bio of the egg donor tomorrow... I am assuming that means they used my picture and chose the most available donor already, and that she's already got treatment underway.
I will say that the choice of egg donor is one bit of this process I'm less than pleased about. The truth is we're not picky so long as she's healthy and fertile, but it sounds like the clinic pretty much chose her for us without offering us any options. I am also concerned whether they are really giving us a "fresh" donor, or whether they plan on using frozen eggs from an earlier donation... because I haven't heard anything from them about syncing a donor's cycle with mine, or whether she's on meds right now, or when her retrieval date might be scheduled, and I'm a little annoyed since their website was pretty clear that the package included a fresh donor egg. If it turns out to be a frozen one instead, it's not like we're not still going to go through with it... but I will be sure to let folks know that what their website says isn't accurate.
I can't believe we're going to be in Greece in a week. Holy cow.
Please, everybody, cross every available appendage in the hopes that this works...?
Saturday, December 6th:
Leaving Denver at 10:48 AM. Arriving at JFK Airport in NYC at 4:27 PM.
Leaving NYC at 8:12 PM. Overnight flight to Rome (8 hours.)
Sunday, December 7th:
Arriving in Rome at 11:40 AM. Taking the train to downtown Rome (about 30 minutes)
Taking a walking tour around the heart of Rome to see as much as we can, including the Parthenon and the Colesseum.
Staying overnight at B&B Elevenrome.
Monday, December 8th:
Check out of the B&B by 6 AM. Walk to the train station (about 30 minutes.)
Take the 6:37 AM train to the airport (about 30 minutes) and arrive by 7:00.
Leaving Rome at 8:40 AM.
Arriving in Athens at 11:40 AM, where our tour package should provide transportation to our hotel.
We will have 6 overnights in Athens total, and 3 overnights in other places as part of the tour package. So at some point during the trip we will be taking a half-day tour of Athens, a one-day cruise between Aegina, Poros and Hydra islands, and tours of Olympia, Delphi and Meteora (with overnights in/near each.) The travel agency is choosing the hotels for this part of our trip, so I'll have to update the itinerary once we get more details about how that's going to work.
Wednesday, December 17th:
Check out of the hotel at probably 4 AM. Our tour package should provide us with transportation back to the airport.
Leaving Athens at 6 AM, arriving in Rome at 7:05 AM.
Leaving Rome at 10:30 AM, arriving in NYC (JFK) at 2:20 PM.
Leaving NYC at 8:14 PM, arriving in Denver at 10:59 PM.
And in the meantime, we'll be continuing our Lupron injections. The Greek Clinic asked me to start taking my estrogen supplements on a steadily increasing schedule, starting yesterday, so we've added that, too. I bought the tickets in my maiden name since that's the name on my passport. Hoping it won't cause an issue, but there isn't time or money to get my passport reissued in my current name.
I've started a travel documents pouch for our IDs, plane tickets, reservations, Rome and Athens maps, and anything else I can think of that we might need in paper form in case we don't have internet access. I'm also going to have to start a packing list. And, I only have a week at work to prepare for being gone for two weeks. The plan is to take two full weeks off of work, which means that I'll have a good four days (Thurs - Sunday) after we get home to recover from jet lag, put my feet up and keep on resting in the first part of the TWW.
Then it's back to work for two and a half days, a half day for Christmas Eve and a full day for Christmas off of work again, another day of work that Friday, and a weekend. We should know by New Year's or so if we are pregnant.
Oh my gosh, this is really happening. The clinic promised to send me the bio of the egg donor tomorrow... I am assuming that means they used my picture and chose the most available donor already, and that she's already got treatment underway.
I will say that the choice of egg donor is one bit of this process I'm less than pleased about. The truth is we're not picky so long as she's healthy and fertile, but it sounds like the clinic pretty much chose her for us without offering us any options. I am also concerned whether they are really giving us a "fresh" donor, or whether they plan on using frozen eggs from an earlier donation... because I haven't heard anything from them about syncing a donor's cycle with mine, or whether she's on meds right now, or when her retrieval date might be scheduled, and I'm a little annoyed since their website was pretty clear that the package included a fresh donor egg. If it turns out to be a frozen one instead, it's not like we're not still going to go through with it... but I will be sure to let folks know that what their website says isn't accurate.
I can't believe we're going to be in Greece in a week. Holy cow.
Please, everybody, cross every available appendage in the hopes that this works...?
Tuesday, November 25, 2014
IVF#1 CD1 - Start Your Engines!
AF came this morning. The moment we've all been waiting for!! (Erm, well, at least the moment Kaitlin and I have been waiting for...)
And this means we're well and truly ready to gear up for this sucker. I have an ultrasound/estrogen bloodwork test scheduled for tomorrow morning. Our Lupron shots continue every night. Once my estrogen level is right, the Greek clinic's going to have me start taking additional estrogen, and we should know then exactly what dates we're going to need to be in Greece.
Then I have to buy tickets and make travel arrangements, and arrange things at work for coverage and so on, and pack, and make arrangements for my mom to watch my dog... and THEN it is off to Greece for an embryo transfer (and a tour of Athens and the nearby areas.) It's looking like the weather in Greece is going to be pretty typical of weather here - some snow and thunderstorms, high temps in the 50's. Not as much fun as being there in the summer, but I'll bring warm clothes because I'm determined we're going to have fun. Who knows, maybe we'll even be there over Christmas... that would be kind of cool.
I started writing a book for our future kiddo. Presumptuous, I know, but I'm trying to be optimistic. I want our kiddo to have a bedtime storybook that tells them how they were conceived - how badly Kaitlin and I wanted to have a baby, and all the things we went through to bring them into our family. It will talk about how we used donors to make the baby we wanted, because the doctors told us we couldn't have a baby on our own. And it means we can raise our kiddo from the very beginning with a loving account of where they came from, how much they were wanted... give them the sense that having them is our happily-ever-after, that they are the happy ending to our story. Anyway, it's ambitious, of course, because I'm assuming we're going to GET a happy ending after all of this, and that part still remains to be seen. But putting it in writing gives me a feeling, however unrealistic, that I have some sort of magic power to make it happen by writing it down.
Anyway, if we do get pregnant, I'm going to ask Kaitlin to do illustrations for the book, and we'll publish it through Snapfish or one of those other scrapbooking kinds of places, and our future kiddo will have their own book, all about them and how they "saved the day" for their moms.
This is really going to happen. We're really going out there. And I am gearing up for what is likely to be the most nervewracking TWW of my entire life...
In the meantime, I completed the edits on my third novel and submitted them. I should be working on my fourth novel coming up next... still having such a hard time getting "into" the new set of characters. This always happens. I think I was probably five or eight chapters into PotH before I really started falling in love with Kade and Erinda. Hoping that's going to happen here, once I really dig into Frost and Panna's story. I'm determined to be a good book-mommy this round, and monitor book awards and blogs and do a real, planned marketing campaign when PotH comes out. Though I realize that ultimately the very best marketing I could do for my books would be to actually just keep writing them, and not let 10 years go by in between. :P
And this means we're well and truly ready to gear up for this sucker. I have an ultrasound/estrogen bloodwork test scheduled for tomorrow morning. Our Lupron shots continue every night. Once my estrogen level is right, the Greek clinic's going to have me start taking additional estrogen, and we should know then exactly what dates we're going to need to be in Greece.
Then I have to buy tickets and make travel arrangements, and arrange things at work for coverage and so on, and pack, and make arrangements for my mom to watch my dog... and THEN it is off to Greece for an embryo transfer (and a tour of Athens and the nearby areas.) It's looking like the weather in Greece is going to be pretty typical of weather here - some snow and thunderstorms, high temps in the 50's. Not as much fun as being there in the summer, but I'll bring warm clothes because I'm determined we're going to have fun. Who knows, maybe we'll even be there over Christmas... that would be kind of cool.
I started writing a book for our future kiddo. Presumptuous, I know, but I'm trying to be optimistic. I want our kiddo to have a bedtime storybook that tells them how they were conceived - how badly Kaitlin and I wanted to have a baby, and all the things we went through to bring them into our family. It will talk about how we used donors to make the baby we wanted, because the doctors told us we couldn't have a baby on our own. And it means we can raise our kiddo from the very beginning with a loving account of where they came from, how much they were wanted... give them the sense that having them is our happily-ever-after, that they are the happy ending to our story. Anyway, it's ambitious, of course, because I'm assuming we're going to GET a happy ending after all of this, and that part still remains to be seen. But putting it in writing gives me a feeling, however unrealistic, that I have some sort of magic power to make it happen by writing it down.
Anyway, if we do get pregnant, I'm going to ask Kaitlin to do illustrations for the book, and we'll publish it through Snapfish or one of those other scrapbooking kinds of places, and our future kiddo will have their own book, all about them and how they "saved the day" for their moms.
This is really going to happen. We're really going out there. And I am gearing up for what is likely to be the most nervewracking TWW of my entire life...
In the meantime, I completed the edits on my third novel and submitted them. I should be working on my fourth novel coming up next... still having such a hard time getting "into" the new set of characters. This always happens. I think I was probably five or eight chapters into PotH before I really started falling in love with Kade and Erinda. Hoping that's going to happen here, once I really dig into Frost and Panna's story. I'm determined to be a good book-mommy this round, and monitor book awards and blogs and do a real, planned marketing campaign when PotH comes out. Though I realize that ultimately the very best marketing I could do for my books would be to actually just keep writing them, and not let 10 years go by in between. :P
Friday, November 14, 2014
Injections start tomorrow
Been a pretty quiet couple weeks on the TTC front. The meds are just sitting on my countertop, and I've spent the time focusing on other things. It's performance evaluation time at work, so I'm in for some loooooong days (and nights) until I can get all my staff's evals done, approved by my boss, reviewed with the staff, signed, and turned in. I've got two mostly done and three to go, but only a week and a half left to finish them in.
In the meantime, last weekend was that SCA event with the Laureling ceremony. I've never been that close to one before so it was pretty awesome to get to really see the inner workings of all the elements that go into it. My apprentice sister did SO MUCH WORK, I really have to believe she is secretly a superhero of some kind. Anyway, it was beautiful, and thankfully she liked the coat I made, and people seemed to like my dress - though I am in desperate need of more comfortable garb. Wearing a full-on Tudor gown for 10 hours gets pretty darned painful by the end of the night. When I get my hands on a little more money I'm going to try and crank out a Norse/Viking. It will give me the chance to practice my abysmal embroidery skills too.
Now it's on to feverishly editing my book for the 12/1 due date. I've only gotten to chapter 7 so far, so I'm really going to have to pick up the pace to have it ready. This weekend, I suspect, will be spent mostly sitting under my electric blanket with my little netbook. It's been freezing cold this week and I've been miserable and cranky, as I always am when the weather turns cold. Ugh.
So this month is still tightly packed and I haven't had the time or energy to pay much attention to keeping house... when I finally do get some breathing room to do chores I fear they're going to take FOREVER to get through. SIGH.
Anyway, I emailed the Greek clinic today to confirm that I should start Lupron tomorrow. I'm guessing these injections will be even less pleasant than the Follistim, because there's no pretty injection pen, just separate little syringes that have to be filled. Uuuuuuuugh. ;.; This had just better turn into a baby that loves me forever and ever for facing one of my biggest phobias every day for the sake of bringing them into the world. :P
I am looking forward to the time off from work. Kind of worried about it too, as it always seems to be when I'm out that shit hits the fan, and I come back to a lot of trouble. Praying to every power in existence that my staff behave themselves, our clients behave themselves, and no calamities arise in the two weeks that I'm planning to be out. But that stress aside, having two whole, blissful weeks of not-being-at-work, and even better, being in Greece, and even better, the chance that I could come home pregnant... it's really a bright spot on the horizon of my life right now. 2015 could be a year that completely changes my life, if we're successful with this.
Here's hoping. Cross fingers for me tomorrow, cause these injections are not going to be fun.
In the meantime, last weekend was that SCA event with the Laureling ceremony. I've never been that close to one before so it was pretty awesome to get to really see the inner workings of all the elements that go into it. My apprentice sister did SO MUCH WORK, I really have to believe she is secretly a superhero of some kind. Anyway, it was beautiful, and thankfully she liked the coat I made, and people seemed to like my dress - though I am in desperate need of more comfortable garb. Wearing a full-on Tudor gown for 10 hours gets pretty darned painful by the end of the night. When I get my hands on a little more money I'm going to try and crank out a Norse/Viking. It will give me the chance to practice my abysmal embroidery skills too.
Now it's on to feverishly editing my book for the 12/1 due date. I've only gotten to chapter 7 so far, so I'm really going to have to pick up the pace to have it ready. This weekend, I suspect, will be spent mostly sitting under my electric blanket with my little netbook. It's been freezing cold this week and I've been miserable and cranky, as I always am when the weather turns cold. Ugh.
So this month is still tightly packed and I haven't had the time or energy to pay much attention to keeping house... when I finally do get some breathing room to do chores I fear they're going to take FOREVER to get through. SIGH.
Anyway, I emailed the Greek clinic today to confirm that I should start Lupron tomorrow. I'm guessing these injections will be even less pleasant than the Follistim, because there's no pretty injection pen, just separate little syringes that have to be filled. Uuuuuuuugh. ;.; This had just better turn into a baby that loves me forever and ever for facing one of my biggest phobias every day for the sake of bringing them into the world. :P
I am looking forward to the time off from work. Kind of worried about it too, as it always seems to be when I'm out that shit hits the fan, and I come back to a lot of trouble. Praying to every power in existence that my staff behave themselves, our clients behave themselves, and no calamities arise in the two weeks that I'm planning to be out. But that stress aside, having two whole, blissful weeks of not-being-at-work, and even better, being in Greece, and even better, the chance that I could come home pregnant... it's really a bright spot on the horizon of my life right now. 2015 could be a year that completely changes my life, if we're successful with this.
Here's hoping. Cross fingers for me tomorrow, cause these injections are not going to be fun.
Monday, November 3, 2014
Meds are here, Procedure delayed
So my meds arrived on Saturday - three boxes of Lupron, which came with syringes, conveniently, so that I don't have to go buy extras - three boxes of estrogen - one box of progesterone (because I already have some left over.)
But, because my period started way early, my procedure had to be rescheduled. I now won't start injections until the 15th of November, which pushes my transfer date back to early/mid December. Much better in terms of plane ticket prices, at least, but I'm worried. I'm now on the eighth day of this period, when they usually only last about five days. I'm finally just spotting, so I should be done today, but between that and how short this last cycle was I've got this awful feeling that maybe there's something wrong... what if we go out there, spend $13,000 on this, and still don't get pregnant?
I wasn't able to sleep last night, thinking about it. My mom reminded me a few days ago that she went through menopause at my age (35) and I'm so worried that it's happening to me now too. And I don't know whether embryo transfer works if you're menopausal??
Anyway, I'm just really nervous.
I got my dress done for the event this weekend, and got my apprentice sister's coat done. My embroidery skills are dreadful but at least from a bit of distance it will look nice... Wish I'd had a little more time, as it would have been nice to put laurels in more places, but I just couldn't squeeze in more than four. Hopefully she likes it. I am nervous about my dress, too. I finally got it altered enough to where the waistline sits in the right spot and the back doesn't scrunch. But it's made out of cheap materials and faked layers, partly for ease of dressing and to be cooler when camping, and partly because I have like NO money to buy fabric right now. I hope that it looks okay.
Since I didn't sleep at all last night I finally just got up and came in to work early. Hoping that means I will get to leave work early today, so I can go home, clean the kitchen, make dinner, get in a little editing and then get to bed. After the event this weekend I'm going to have to focus on nothing but edits... but the nice thing is, edits are due before the Greece trip, so I won't have to spend our vacation worrying about them. All in all, the delay in this treatment is for the best. I know it is, since my body is obviously resetting itself right now, and it will probably make for a less stressful last-minute thing for the donor too. Oddly, they still haven't sent me a list of their available female donors, so I have no idea if they're picking someone for me or just waiting until my cycle is ready before calling one in.
Anyway, that's what's on my mind this week. Two weeks, then, before injections start up again. I guess we're really stretching this year's OLW (CONCIEVE) into the last possible moments, aren't we? :P
But, because my period started way early, my procedure had to be rescheduled. I now won't start injections until the 15th of November, which pushes my transfer date back to early/mid December. Much better in terms of plane ticket prices, at least, but I'm worried. I'm now on the eighth day of this period, when they usually only last about five days. I'm finally just spotting, so I should be done today, but between that and how short this last cycle was I've got this awful feeling that maybe there's something wrong... what if we go out there, spend $13,000 on this, and still don't get pregnant?
I wasn't able to sleep last night, thinking about it. My mom reminded me a few days ago that she went through menopause at my age (35) and I'm so worried that it's happening to me now too. And I don't know whether embryo transfer works if you're menopausal??
Anyway, I'm just really nervous.
I got my dress done for the event this weekend, and got my apprentice sister's coat done. My embroidery skills are dreadful but at least from a bit of distance it will look nice... Wish I'd had a little more time, as it would have been nice to put laurels in more places, but I just couldn't squeeze in more than four. Hopefully she likes it. I am nervous about my dress, too. I finally got it altered enough to where the waistline sits in the right spot and the back doesn't scrunch. But it's made out of cheap materials and faked layers, partly for ease of dressing and to be cooler when camping, and partly because I have like NO money to buy fabric right now. I hope that it looks okay.
Since I didn't sleep at all last night I finally just got up and came in to work early. Hoping that means I will get to leave work early today, so I can go home, clean the kitchen, make dinner, get in a little editing and then get to bed. After the event this weekend I'm going to have to focus on nothing but edits... but the nice thing is, edits are due before the Greece trip, so I won't have to spend our vacation worrying about them. All in all, the delay in this treatment is for the best. I know it is, since my body is obviously resetting itself right now, and it will probably make for a less stressful last-minute thing for the donor too. Oddly, they still haven't sent me a list of their available female donors, so I have no idea if they're picking someone for me or just waiting until my cycle is ready before calling one in.
Anyway, that's what's on my mind this week. Two weeks, then, before injections start up again. I guess we're really stretching this year's OLW (CONCIEVE) into the last possible moments, aren't we? :P
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